Winter is HERE:(

I'm mostly sad about the winter but somehow excited about the prospect of playing in the snow. I love the holidays and I love being with family. I'm not so sure I always felt that way, there was a rebellious side to me that pushed away my family for a long time. Probably because I felt guilty or sad about the person I was. I chose my friends over my family, now, being a parent I can imagine how much that hurt my parents feelings. When I grew out of my selfish stage and became a wife and a mother I was SHOCKED at just how special and beautiful each one of my family members are. My father is one of the most caring men I know. He and I struggle with our relationship because we are such different people but I wished he could know just how much I admire him and want him to be proud of me. My Mother oh my sweet Mother. There is nothing more clarifying then becoming a mother yourself. I have never understood, felt more gratitude for, or just been in awe of who my Mother is. She has helped me with so much throughout my life and more so since I have become a mother myself. She is beautiful and gently and loving and special and truly one of my best friends. My sisters are truly my best friends now. I never thought I would feel that way because I had so much guilt I pushed them as far away as I could. However, Anna, Suzy, Carrie and Sarah are honestly my best friends! I call and cry to them, I ask advice, I laugh ALL the time with them and I LOVE LOVE LOVE THEM! My brothers are so sweet and kind. Dan has always had a tender spot for me and he is always helpful and loving! Joseph is silly and helpful and always does what I ask him to do even if I shouldn't have asked. I seriously took these people for granted and never saw just how amazing they truly are. I am blessed to have a personal and real relationship with each member of my family. I am blessed to be a Mortimer and I am happy they have forgiven the silliness of a girl who had everything wrong! Friendship is the purest when it is held between family members! There love is endless and meaningful. I love you my family and I am glad I have you for eternity!